NP&G

Lillie Ruth Is Rocking It

Being four is tough.

I mean, really tough.

You’re not a baby anymore, and you’ll be the first person to remind everyone of that. But you’re not quite one of the big kids either. You’re stuck somewhere in the middle—old enough to have very big opinions, but still little enough that sometimes those big feelings are way too much for your tiny body to hold.

And right now, our Lillie Ruth is right there in the thick of it.

Four is wanting to do everything “BY MYSELF!” and then, five minutes later, desperately needing Mama because something didn’t go exactly as planned.

Four is knowing exactly which cup you wanted—but somehow everyone else was supposed to know, too.

Four is wanting independence while still needing cuddles.

It’s wanting to be brave while also wanting someone to check under the bed.

It’s running full speed into the world one minute and crawling into Mama’s lap the next.

Four is hard.

But goodness, Lillie Ruth is rocking it.

She is growing into this funny, strong, sweet, opinionated little person right before our eyes. Every day, there seems to be a little more independence. A little more confidence. A little more personality.

Okay… maybe a lot more personality.

There are moments when four tests every ounce of patience we have. The negotiations. The tears over things that seem incredibly small to grown-ups but feel enormous to her. The sudden declarations that something she loved yesterday is absolutely unacceptable today.

And sometimes I have to remind myself that she’s not giving me a hard time.

She’s having a hard time.

Because being four means learning how to be a person.

She’s learning what disappointment feels like.

She’s learning that sometimes the answer is no.

She’s learning how to share, how to wait, how to apologize, how to speak up, how to calm down and how to try again.

She’s learning that she can be angry with someone and still love them.

She’s learning that mistakes don’t mean the end of the world.

She’s learning where she fits in this big family of ours.

And she’s doing all of that while still being little enough to need her mama.

There are days when I look at her and see the baby she was. I can still picture that tiny little girl who needed me for absolutely everything.

Then she says something hilarious, puts her hands on her hips with all the confidence in the world, or insists she can handle something completely on her own, and suddenly I catch a glimpse of the girl she’s becoming.

That’s the bittersweet part of motherhood.

We spend so much time teaching them how to grow that sometimes we don’t realize just how quickly they’re actually doing it.

So yes, being four is hard.

There are big feelings.

There are battles over things that make absolutely no sense.

There are tears.

There are giggles.

There are a million questions.

There are moments of fierce independence followed immediately by, “Mama, hold me.”

And I hope I never become so focused on correcting the hard parts that I forget to celebrate the beautiful ones.

Because Lillie Ruth is learning.

She’s growing.

She’s figuring out this whole big world one four-year-old adventure at a time.

And through all the messiness, emotions, laughter, stubbornness, sweetness and growing pains, one thing is certain:

Lillie Ruth is absolutely rocking being four.

And I am so incredibly lucky that I get a front-row seat. ❤️